Are you stupid or just on crack?

So I went to Best Buy looking for micromedia or compact flash.

I get to the camera dept were they have them, and I am just browsing.

Up walks this guy about 20 to 24 years old, wearing a lab coat, one of the white kind you see Dr.’s wearing.

“Hi can I help you find anything?”

Now if you know me and my looks it does not take a very perceptive person to quickly realize I have not even met you and already I hate you and I sure don’t want to talk to your goofy self.

This guy was anything but perceptive.

Me in my normal rude leave me alone tone “No I found what I am looking for.”

Then he does the unthinkable.

“My name is stupid, and you are?” and STICKS his hand out to shake mine.

????? Dude are you on crack and put on a DR’S coat or something? Does the Phsych Hospital know your out in public?
Did you not catch the glare I gave you when you walked up and the worse one when you first opened your pie hole?
Did you miss the rude tone in my voice?
Did you mistake my evil looks as wanting to kiss you?
Did your parents have any children that lived?

I looked at his hand for about a second then looked at him with all those questions running across my face.

He smiles like he wants to hug me!

I did not shake his hand….and told him my name was Mr. Elwood and asked him why the hell he was wearing a Halloween costume!

He still didn’t get it!

He then ask me what kind of camera I had what kind of lenses and were I got my pictures printed!
I told him about my camera politly and the lenses, then I said I printed my own pictures at home. (A lie but I was setting him up!)
He then tells me about the great prices they have on printing pictures at best buy and how great the quality was!
So I asked him with the only pleasing look on my face so far.

“I take male gay sex pictures, can you print those here? I have been looking for a place to get them printed, and can you print 8x10, because my customers really like the bigger prints, and would my privacy be protected and…”

Well he got all chocked up, turned red, said uh well uh we uh um uh…

I turned and walked off much happier!

New bugs (or old bugs?)

Michael Schirber
LiveScience Staff Writer
LiveScience.com

Namesakes of the U.S. President and two of his key people might be crawling around your back yard as you read this.






Three new beetles of the genus Agathidium have been named after members of the current administration: A. bushi, A. cheneyi and A. rumsfeldi.

Two former Cornell University entomologists, Quentin Wheeler and Kelly Miller, were in charge of naming 65 new species of slime-mold beetles, which they discovered while studying the insects' evolution and classification.

Wheeler, who is now head of entomology at the Natural History Museum in London, said that the choice to name beetles after President George W. Bush, Vice President Dick Cheney, and Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld was out of admiration for their principles, not because they look like the beetles.

None of these beetles make their home inside the Beltway.

Wheeler said Agathidium bushi has been found in southern Ohio, North Carolina and Virginia; Agathidium cheneyi inhabits Chiapas, Mexico; and Agathidium rumsfeldi is known from Oaxaca and Hidalgo in Mexico.

The slime-mold beetles are so-called because they feed on fungi-like molds.

Some of the other recently identified specimens were named after the entomologists' wives and their scientific illustrator, as well as Pocahontas, Hernan Cortez, and the Aztecs.

Most of the rest of the names are derived from various geographic locations or distinguishing features. One of the beetles was called A. vaderi because of its shiny, Darth-Vader-like head.

Scientists are allowed to name the species they discovery. According to rules established by the International Commission on Zoological Nomenclature, the species name must end in "i" if it comes from a person.

The rather long scientific names also includes the names of those who first described the species.

The new names are reported in a monograph in the March 24, 2005, issue of the Bulletin of the American Museum of Natural History.

Short a Testicle, Sexually Lopsided Beetles Still Do Their Thing
Creepy Pets: Huge Beetles Sell for $130
Why Insects Swarm, and the Gory Endings of Loners
Vote Now: the Ugliest Animals
Visit LiveScience.com for more daily news, views and scientific inquiry with an original, provocative point of view. LiveScience reports amazing, real world breakthroughs, made simple and stimulating for people on the go. Check out our collection of Image Galleries, Interactive Features, Trivia and more.

Bluebonnets

Took some pics of bluebonnets at lunch today. 

Field of bluebonnets for my displaced Texas friends. 

Not again

June of last year I broke my foot.
built the pool with a broken foot.

Friday playing raquet ball during lunch I broke my big toe.
about typical.

No didnt go to no dang DR.
Just what exactly would he tell me (aint going to no female dr again...Ill blog about the boot camp horror story another time thank you very much)
He would tape it up.
Heck I can do that.

my solution is to take 2 shots of bourbon and a splash of coke!

Crop of a pic I took this morning. 

Fan

There's a teacher in a small Texas town. She asks her class how many of them are Bush fans. Not really knowing what a Bush fan is, but wanting to be liked by the teacher, all the kids raise their hands except one boy, Johnny. The teacher asks Johnny why he has decided to be different. Johnny says, "I'm not a bush fan." The teacher says, "Why aren't you a bush fan?" Johnny says, "I'm an Al Gore fan"
The teacher asks why he's an Al Gore fan. The boy says, "Well, my mom's an Al Gore fan and my dad's an Al Gore fan, so I'm an Al Gore fan!" The teacher is kind of angry, because this is Texas, so she says, "What if you're mom was a moron and you're dad was an idiot, what would that make you?" Johnny says, "That would make me a Bush fan."

Sons trailer for his lawn mowing buisness 

So my daughter came up to me wanting some money last year.

“Dad, can you give me 10 dollars to buy some earrings from claires”

“NO”

“Well how can I buy them”

“GET A JOB”

“Well dad I am only 14”

“BABYSIT”

So she printed up fliers and put them all over the neighborhood and she has been babysitting a little bit and buying earrings and Johnny Depp posters and typical 14yr old girl stuff.

So my son came up a few months ago

“Dad can I have 50 dollars to buy this x-box football game”

“NO”

“Well how can I buy it?”

“GET A JOB”

“Well dad I am only 12”

“SO MOW YARDS”

So he printed flyers and distributed them in the neighborhood and already has 2 clients.

Now me, I charge them both 20 bucks a month to use the phone for there business. And I am leasing my son the lawnmower since its mine. And I charge them for the paper and ink and the use of my printer for the fliers. Also I charge a tax of 30% on all income they receive for housing and food..

I sure hope they get a lot more jobs!

Boy talk about hate.

The Terry Shiavo mess! Jeez them guys hate the hell out of each other!

I can not imagine hating someone so much! And I dislike most people on pure principal.

Personally I think Michael Shiavo has the mind of a 3 year old. He is throwing one hell of a temper fit!
Dude, uhhh hello, your wife is/was a vegatable, so you shacked up with another woman and had 2 kids. Why the hell are you so intent on "punishing" her parents? Her parents did not go out and pick up a replacment daughter, they have stood by her side for a long time.

Terrys mom and dad, uhh hello your grown adults start acting like them. If you cant change stupids (the son in laws) mind then move on. If you believe 100% in your religion then you would know that your god is not going to be upset at all about how or were your daughter is buried. He or she (your god) knows you gave 100% and that is all he or she can ask.

My parents may or may not have fought to keep me alive if I was in the same situation as Terry was, but I will say they would have acted more like grown adults and moved on. Heck mom would just say a few hail mary's and everything would be fine.

An expression I hear all the time "you can chose friends but you cant chose family"
well you cut your friends lose when its hopeless and family, well they may always be family but you sure the heck dont go to the extent these fools did.

Me I have disowned and acctepted back nearly all my bros and sisters at one time or another. I get over it.

A wise man said to me along time ago, "you cant change some poeples minds learn to live with the way they are"

I think it was told to me when I was suppose to mow the yard and was trying to talk him out of making me do that. He was right. I mowed the dang yard!

Ok back to your bourbon and diet coke (I am trying to lose a few pounds shut up!)

panoply

By BEN DOBBIN, Associated Press Writer

ROCHESTER, N.Y. - A 36-year-old woman with severe hypertension has been fitted with a pacemaker-like implant that, in limited trials in Europe, has shown promise in controlling wayward blood pressure through electronic stimulation of neck-artery nerves

Annette Lawrence, a mother of three, has suffered for a decade from a chronic condition that a panoply of drugs and lifestyle changes has failed to alleviate.



I had to look that word up.

5 entries found for panoply.
pan·o·ply Audio pronunciation of "panoply" ( P ) Pronunciation Key (pn-pl)
n. pl. pan·o·plies

1. A splendid or striking array: a panoply of colorful flags. See Synonyms at display.
2. Ceremonial attire with all accessories: a portrait of the general in full panoply.
3. Something that covers and protects: a porcupine's panoply of quills.
4. The complete arms and armor of a warrior.


[Greek panopli : pan-, pan- + hopla, arms, armor, pl. of hoplon, weapon.]

[Download or Buy Now]
Source: The American Heritage® Dictionary of the English Language, Fourth Edition
Copyright © 2000 by Houghton Mifflin Company.
Published by Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

Main Entry: panoply1
Part of Speech: noun
Definition: a complete and magnificent array
Etymology: Greek pan- + hopla `armor'

Source: Webster's New Millennium™ Dictionary of English, Preview Edition (v 0.9.5)
Copyright © 2003, 2004 Lexico Publishing Group, LLC

Main Entry: panoply2
Part of Speech: noun
Definition: a full suit of armor; a complete defense or covering
Etymology: Greek pan- + hopla `armor'

Source: Webster's New Millennium™ Dictionary of English, Preview Edition (v 0.9.5)
Copyright © 2003, 2004 Lexico Publishing Group, LLC